Goodbye Secrets Read online

  “Right here,” I muster, and grab her legs. I pull her body down harshly, lifting her right leg so I can situate myself and enter her. I bring her to church as quickly as I possibly can.

  “Grayson, are you okay?”

  I lift my head to look up at her. My breathing mirrors that of someone who’s just run the last leg of a marathon at top speed. I have a feeling her concern is not my breathing, though, so why is she asking?

  “Besides the situations we’ve been finding ourselves in, I’m fine. As long as I have you, doll, everything is right with the world!” My lips play with hers as I slowly pull out. “Why do you ask?”

  She just shrugs.

  We get up and hit the shower. I successfully fight the urge to slap her bottom and take her again. It is quite the accomplishment on my part!

  “Becca, please don’t wear those jeans anymore, darling.” I close my eyes to shake my thoughts away. Her arse looks delicious in them.

  “Why?” She looks in the mirror to see what’s wrong.

  “They fill my head with naughty thoughts.” This confession produces a satisfied smirk across her face.

  It’s rush hour, but we arrive at Mass General in three minutes flat with Becca as our stunt driver.

  “Honestly, sweetheart, you should try out for NASCAR.” I am half serious. While having her behind the wheel puts my heart in my throat, she is a very skilled, very confident, erratic driver.

  “Stop it. Let’s go!” We get out and Becca instinctively puts her hand in mine. We head over to the Ellison Building and hit the number four for the Blake Twelve ICU. I bring Becca’s hand up to my lips to place several kisses as we await our destination. She leans into me for added comfort. In our relationship, we seem to always focus best when there is a crisis at hand. Sometimes, it’s “For better” I worry about. The elevator dings and we head to Stacey’s room at a quick pace. As soon as we enter, Ray jumps up. Oh, Christ!

  “Becca! Oh God, are you okay?” He grabs Becca away from me, hugs her, and kisses her face. My team is on him like a fly on shit. “What the hell? Get off of me! I’m not going to hurt her! He’s the one hurting her!” Ray yells.

  “Ray, what the hell are you talking about?” Becca asks angrily through her teeth and raises her hand for Derek and Ryan to let him go.

  “Baby, I got all of your messages. I’ve been trying to get to you. I had just made it to California when I found out you flew back and that Stacey was in the hospital.” I knock his hand away from Becca’s face and pull her closer to me.

  “What messages, Ray? I haven’t called you, texted you, or emailed you!”

  Becca is looking at him as if he has five heads. I’m also finding this story very interesting. My team tracked him all the way to California. Who is the person on the untraceable line he’s always talking to? I keep my mouth shut about what I know. I’ve got a terrible feeling, but I hope I’m wrong.

  “Becca, I have all of the messages on my phone.” He pulls it out and retrieves them. We hear a woman barely saying Ray’s name and then some arsehole trying to imitate me yelling and hitting her.

  “Ray, that is not me, and it’s certainly not Grayson.” Becca shakes her head.

  “Abso-bloody-lutely not!” I yell. What a fucking idiot!

  “It’s not?” He seems miffed. “Who would do this? Becs, I don’t understand. Who would do this to Stace?” Tears are pooling in his eyes.

  “Well, we think George is behind it, and—”

  I squeeze her hand, hoping she knows that means shut the hell up!

  “Well, we still haven’t found him.” She looks up at me and winks. Smart girl.

  “Becs, can I talk to you for a minute?” He grabs her hand and nods toward the hallway.

  “Um ...” She looks to me. I reluctantly nod. She starts to walk out with him.

  “Mrs. James, your purse.” Derek pulls her bag higher on her shoulder and slips a small device into it. A bug? Oh man, he’s good. Big bonus check for him! They walk out after she thanks him. He gives me a Bluetooth earpiece and asks via a small speaker on his sleeve for somebody else to begin recording.

  “Brilliant!” I say to him. He places his finger over his lips. Right!

  “Oh, Becs, I’ve missed you, baby.”

  He’s fucking kissing her! My blood boils.

  “Ray, stop!” Good girl.

  “Please, just one kiss. You owe me that much after the way you treated me!” he snaps.

  “Ray, I said no!” Her refusal becomes sterner. “I was going to email you back, Ray, but what I wanted to say, I felt you deserved for me to say in person. I am truly sorry for the way I acted. I led you on and I regret that. In my defense, I didn’t know I was leading you on at that time. I was very confused and scared about my feelings for Grayson. You were my known, he was my unknown. I love you, Ray. I always will. But I’m so in love with Grayson. I want to spend the rest of my life with him. I want to have his children. I’m really sorry for the way I handled this. You are my best friend and I never meant to hurt you. I was selfish and irresponsible and I hope that someday you can forgive me and we can be friends again. I want nothing but happiness for you.”

  “Becca, do you regret making love to me?” He’s barely audible.

  “Ray, don’t touch me like that. I regret the timing only.”

  My blood pulses powerfully throughout my body. I can hear it throbbing in my head. I want to go out there and choke him. Derek keeps his hand on me.

  “Becs, we were so amazing together. There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t think of how we made love. Your sounds. Your taste. Becs, it was more than what you are saying. You know it. I know it. Your body knows it.”

  He’s trying to fucking seduce her!

  “Ray, stop it. I’m marrying Grayson. I love Grayson. Get out of my face!”

  I see Becca pushing him away, but he grabs her hands and pins her up against the wall. I surge forward again to get to her. Derek nods toward Ryan and releases me at the same time.

  “Grayson! Ryan!” she yells as we come charging. As we pull him off of her, my fist “accidentally” flies in the air and hits his face. Becca rushes into my arms. “Goddamn it, Ray!” she yells at him. Just then, Stacey’s day nurse swings by.

  “This is an ICU! We can’t have this kind of behavior!” She’s stern, but you can sense her nervousness.

  “I’m sorry ... Sharon.” I read her badge. “Mr. McNeil was just leaving.”

  Ryan escorts him down the hall. He keeps glancing back at Becca. I’ve never seen Ray look so ... dark.

  “Am I in the fucking Twilight Zone?” Becca turns back to me and asks.

  “You know, sweetheart, I’ve been asking myself that a lot lately.” I hug her again and we head into Stacey’s room.

  No change, with the exception of a decrease in her brain swelling. Sharon walks in to take vitals. “Sharon, I’m Becca. This is my husband, Grayson. I forgot to ask Jen this morning—is the coma from the trauma, or is it medically induced to help her body recoup?”

  “No, this one is natural. We’re not sure how long it will last.” She frowns. Becca looks down and plays with her engagement ring. “That’s a gorgeous ring.” Sharon takes her hand to have a better look. Becca smiles and thanks her. “Lucky girl.” Sharon winks at her as she looks from the ring up to me and back. Becca just grins, nods, and looks at her ring again. I feel my heart bathe in warmth.

  “Oh, Gracie,” Aunt Hazel gasps as she walks in and sees Stacey for the first time.

  “Hazel!” Becca cries and runs to her. Aunt Hazel hugs her and kisses her head while Becca sobs into her neck. I feel a pang of guilt for keeping them apart. They go into the hallway to talk, and I sit next to Stacey.

  “Stacey, c’mon now, sweetheart. Oops! I’m not allowed to call you sweetheart. I made Becca jealous doing that. It was the most fantastic moment!” I smile with satisfaction at the memory. “You must wake up and tell us who did this to you. It will help us put him behind bars. I’ll give
you anything you want! We need you—Becca needs you!” I kiss her hand.

  BECCA

  After a little over two weeks with no change in Stacey, Grayson and I decide to finally take the drive up to my B&B. I can’t wait to see Claudia and Rocco. I can’t wait to have my divorce finalized.

  “Excited to head home, sweetheart?” Grayson grabs my hand and glances over at me.

  “Yes.” I try to smile, but I do have very mixed emotions.

  “Why don’t we do our Christmas shopping while we’re here?” He’s been trying to get me out of the funky mood I’ve been in for at least three days now. I miss my daughter, my best friend is healing but still comatose, and I haven’t been home in over a month. To make matters worse, Christmas is two weeks away, and I have nothing done and no Christmas spirit. “Becca, sweetheart, please, honey, I need you to snap out of this. You feel so distant.” He’s worried, worried he’s losing me. But he’s not losing me—I’m losing me. On top of all this stuff, the stress has done a number on me. I haven’t felt a hundred percent for the past week. I scheduled an appointment with my doctor for a physical. That’s tomorrow.

  “When would you like to get married, sweetheart?” Oh, Gracie, baby!

  “I’m hoping that Stacey wakes up soon. As soon as she’s able to stand by my side, I’d like to get married.”

  “Bec ...” he starts. I can see the concern on his face.

  “Gray, I know, obviously we will only wait an acceptable amount of time. I realize no one knows when she’ll be out of the coma.” I turn the stereo on. I don’t want to talk anymore.

  “Okay, love,” is all he says.

  We head straight to the courthouse and arrive fifteen minutes early. Attorney Brown greets us and pulls us into a room just to go over everything again. We then head into the courtroom and take a seat to wait to be called. After twenty minutes or so, I finally hear my name. Judge Sear goes over my file and asks me a few questions.

  “State your full name, please.”

  “Becca Kirsten Campbell.”

  “Where do you live?” I give him the address to the B&B. “Where and when were you married?”

  “July 15, 2001. Fort Dix, New Jersey.”

  “I see your husband was declared dead for seven years and it has come to your attention that he is alive, went AWOL, kidnapped you, and is still wanted for his crimes.” He looks up at me over the top of his half-moon frames.

  “Yes, sir.”

  “Names and ages of your children with your spouse.”

  “Morgan Alexa Campbell. Ten years old, sir.”

  “With whom does your child live with?”

  “Me, sir.”

  “How long have you lived in the state of New Hampshire, Mrs. Campbell?”

  “Six years, sir.”

  “Please state what you want.”

  “A divorce, Your Honor.” The questions continue about possible reconciliation ... No. Child support and joint custody ... No and no. Documents are clarified. After ten minutes or so, my divorce is granted. I hug Grayson fiercely.

  “Oh, I can’t wait to marry you, sweetheart!” He kisses me over and over as we walk out of the courthouse. I suddenly don’t feel so well. The room spins. “Oh, shit!” Gray yells. That’s all I remember.

  “There you go, sweetheart, that’s it.” I hear Gray and flutter my eyes.

  “What happened?” I sit up slowly in a strange office.

  “You passed out, Becca.” The woman next to me smiles and throws out the smelling salt.

  “Oh ... sorry.” I offer a slight one back. Grayson is deep in thought. He holds out his hand and thanks her. We head out to the car. Grayson grabs my phone, looks up my doctor, and calls. He asks to get me seen today. Luckily, she can see me now if we head right over. “Sorry that happened.” I squeeze his hand before I get into the car. He’s silent the whole way there.

  I place my hand in his as we walk into the doctor’s office and up to the receptionist. Grayson gets on his phone.

  “Susanna, can you fax Becca’s insurance card to this number?” He reads the number off the business card at the desk. “Yes, both sides.”

  “Grayson, I have my insurance card.” I pull it out.

  “No, sweetheart, I canceled that one. You and your staff are under my company’s plan,” he says, then turns to the receptionist. “Ma’am, Becca’s card is being faxed right now. Thanks, Susanna.” He hangs up. She gives me a new form for updated info, and Grayson watches me fill it out. He squeezes my knee when I put his name down twice—as my emergency contact, and as the person to release medical information to. The littlest things mean so much to him. I hand in my form, sit, and wait. Julia, the nurse, comes out and calls me back. Grayson follows me in. She takes my vitals.

  “Becca, your blood pressure is really low for you.”

  My eyes widen at this information. I always have excellent blood pressure. The only time I’ve ever had low blood pressure was during my pregnancy with Morgan.

  “What is it, sweetheart?” Grayson looks down at me. I just bite my bottom lip to hold back my smile. “Becca?”

  “Shh, the doctor’s coming.”

  Dr. Peto walks in.

  “Hi, Becca. What happened?” she asks. I tell her I passed out and haven’t been feeling well, and that I’ve been under a lot of stress. She asks Grayson to leave the room so she can give me a full exam. He’s not thrilled, but I nod him out. I have a few questions for her that I don’t want him to hear.

  “I think I might be pregnant,” I whisper.

  “I think you might be right.” She smiles. She hands me a cup and I go into the adjacent bathroom to do my business. When I bring out exhibit A, she dips it and proceeds to give me an exam. I ask her the question I was going to ask tomorrow. We’re both embarrassed, but she gives me the answer to the best of her knowledge. “Becca, you are definitely swollen.” She smiles, then does my pap smear then pulls out the alien shoehorn. I hate that thing! She pulls her gloves off and walks over to the counter to check my results.

  “Congratulations, Mama!” She laughs. I start sobbing—happily. “I’ll set you up for an ultrasound right away, since you had a strange period last month,” she says before heading out of the room to have her nurse call down. I start to get dressed.

  “Becca?” Grayson’s voice is gentle. I wipe my tears and turn to him. “What is it? What’s the matter?” He pulls me to him.

  “Hi.” I find myself giggling now.

  “Yes, hi, sweetheart. What did she say?”

  “Um, well, I have to go downstairs for an ultrasound.” I try to be serious.

  “Why? What’s the matter?” His eyes widen wildly as he cups my face—complete panic mode for Grayson.

  “Apparently, there’s a growth in my stomach. Well, my uterus, really.”

  “What kind of growth, Becca?” His brow furrows and the intensity of his stare softens.

  I laugh. “The kind that’s going to wake us every few hours at night for a feeding.” Oh, there’s the lightbulb.

  “Bloody hell, Becca! We’re having a baby?” he yells excitedly. I nod and hug him. “Oh, Becca! You had me so worried—why couldn’t you just say you were pregnant?” He’s happy and irritated. He lets me finish getting dressed. We grab my prenatal prescription and head downstairs for the ultrasound.

  Tina globs goop on my belly and moves the wand around.

  “Nope, we’ll have to do the internal.” Ugh! Off to the bathroom I go to pull everything off. When I come back out and lay down, Tina puts a condom-like covering on the wand. Grayson gasps.

  “Where the hell is that going?”

  I look at him as if he has five heads, and he laughs.

  “Oh, Becca, that’s awful. You women really get the raw end of the deal, aye?”

  I shake my head and hold his hand as she inserts the wand, which actually looks like a boring BOB.

  “There he is!” Tina smiles and points out the little bean.

  “He?” Grayson asks.
r />   “Oh, I say that for all of them until we know the sex. It’s better than saying ‘it.’”

  “The heart’s beating, so I guess I am about six weeks?”

  I point the heart out to Grayson. A tear falls down his cheek.

  “Becca, I love you so much. Thank you.” He kisses my face over and over again.

  “You are measuring at six weeks and two days, so you’re on target. That puts your due date at August sixteenth.” She prints out a picture and hands it to us.

  We head out to the rental car in our new bliss.

  “I can’t believe we have to wait until August,” Grayson complains.

  “Oh, it will be here before you know it.” I laugh and pat my belly. Funny thing about women: as soon as we find out we’re pregnant, our hands instantly become obsessed with our bellies.

  We arrive at the B&B and I take in a sharp breath. I’m afraid to face all the changes that have occurred without my knowledge or clearance. I look at Grayson. Shit! His eyelids are blinking faster than I drive.

  “Fuck ...” I breathe.

  “Fuckity fuck ...” Grayson adds. We both sense the calm before the storm. “Sweetheart, remember you are pregnant now. Try not to overreact.” I hear the faint sound of a bell dinging. All Sybeccas have their gloves up. Of course, Horny Sybecca and Porn Sybecca are facing the wrong way, wearing thongs. TRAITORS!

  “Grayson, you and I have different ideas about what is a normal reaction and what is an overreaction.” I clench my teeth because he’s already pissing me off.

  “Becca, please remember that everything I do, I do it for you.”

  I laugh. “Channeling a little Bryan Adams, baby?”

  “Huh? Oh. Stop it. You know what I mean, Becca. Please, I’m so happy today, I don’t want to fight. Promise me you won’t lose it.” He palms my face.

  “I’ll try, but you know how I’ve been feeling.” Tears plummet down my face. He thumbs them away and leans in slowly. His tongue beckons for my mouth to open up, and as I do, my theme song changes. I hear the beginning chords to “Let’s Get It On” by Marvin Gaye. I laugh as I kiss him.